Instead, I want to share some thoughts I have been having this week. About judging. Judging ourselves. Why do we (and I am just assuming your like me) judge ourselves so harshly on these truly unrealistic standards? I mean come on I want to be the mom on Leave it to Beaver, the independant career woman on Designing women, the hotty on Desperate housewives, and yet still have time to be me. LOL NOT POSSIBLE! Sure, I can take bits and pieces of what I want for my life, who I want to be and mold them together, but I have to let go of all these preconcieved ideas. I have to let go of what "looks good" and do what "is good". BIG difference. I also need to understand this one statement:
What's the point, if I am moving too fast to enjoy it?
That means everything in my life, from my marriage, to my kids, to my ministry at church, to everything I am about. INCLUDING my weightloss journey. Being an avid list maker, and loving to cross off so many things in it every day (measuring my success for the day at what is marked off ignoring all the EXTRA things I did tht wasnt even on the list) makes me very focused, but also keeps me from enjoying little blessings that are thrown my way. If I am not careful, I could miss out on hearing the conversation between the drama queen and one of the twinkies that is showing me the seeds of unconditional love are not only being planted, but harvested as well. Constant cooking, cleaning, and preparing things to make them easy for my husband the next day are good, but NOT if i get so tired, I forget that we need that intimate time too. BALANCE!
I judge myself constantly, and am always seeming like I am looking for something to complain about. Not necessarily about someone else, but myself. I can give you alist a mile long of things I dont' like about myself, but what would the list be of what I DO like about me? Probably pretty short. This is something that I fall short on, and am working HARD to overcome. Daily. It's a battle, a struggle, but yet, I do have the faith in myself that I can overcome this completely.
Then I think do I judge others as hard as I judge myself? Probably not. I do however get confused at people's behavoir and what they think is "right". But who am I? I am NO ONE and it doesn't matter! It truly doesn't matter. The only time it matters if it effects my kids, my marriage, myself. And if it does, then I do something about it. IF it doesn't, I have learned to just shake my head, and let it go. It doesn't matter what I think of you. It doesnt matter what others think of me. (Well, it does to an extent. How I carry myself, the way I respond to situations, and the things I say DO matter, because I am a walking advertisement for Christ. If I phony, mean, rude, judgemental, critical, etc, that doesn't give Him a very good chance of someone who may only come to learn about him, trust him, and love him through my actions.)
I have been wanting to blog everyday this week, but apparently there are some issues with Blogger that I can't control. UGH! I am lucky however today for it all to work out just right. (And I do believe that my time has been limited this week with the extra walking, and enjoying life). I hope ya'll have been doing well, and enjoy your day today! I have been vlogging again on youtube, and love that venue! I may share some of the links soon, but not today. ( I am limited on blog time).
Have a blessed Wednesday! Today is the day the Lord has made, now go and be glad in it!