Yesterday, I had a huge revelation. I realized that I TOO liked me! It of course didn't hit me in a way that came with butterflies fluttering or birds singing. Instead it came with tears flowing.
It started with a reaction to some uncomplimentary words from my beloved. He didn't intentionally hurt my feelings, it just happened. Even though I was hurt, I went to prayer. I was down in a pit that I that I didnt' want to be in. I knew if I was going to get out of it, I needed HIS help. What I thought was a relationship issue between my husband and I, I realized God was moving me in a way to see something REAL about myself. Did he give my husbands the hurtful words to say? OF course not. That is not what I am saying. BUT He did however use it for His good!
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28
Even though I have evoked this amazing approval of who I have become inside and out of myself, I was still eagerly waiting for validation of these feelings to come from my husband. It was like I couldn't allow myself to feel beautiful, strong, and confident unless my husband told me he saw these things in me.
Guess what! I no longer need to hang on to the hope that maybe he likes how i have changed, because I finally do myself. Not in a fake kind of way, but in a FREE kind of way. In a way that I know God is going to use to further His kingdom!
Love in Christ,
“He must increase, but I must decrease.” – John 3:30
Ps. Weight was down yet again this morning! God ~ you are amazing!