It never ceases to amaze me at how easy it s to get off target in our lives. We set our sites on one area of living, and before we know it, we are clearly not only away from our target but off track all the way. I find myself in a way, being off track in my life and I don't like it one bit. For a few weeks now I have been struggling trying to find my idenity, searching for just exactly who I am. Am I "just" such and such or can I possibly be more? I realize it's because I am not really actively persuing the best within me. Sure, I can do many things well, but can I be ME well?
When I read the verse selection above I read it in a way that was so different then we normal read it. What struck me the most was this: "Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewlery or fine clothes. Rather it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight." If you have ever been so fixiated on something you know easy it is to be "focused" and even feel like you are "dedicated". I put "quotes" around those words for emphasis, because there are times our focus and dedication are spent on the wrong thing. The thing that truly matters.
When I want people to look at me, I don't want them to think "Wow. She has her life together because she looks thin, and is well dressed. There is no way I could be like her." I want them to look at me and say "There is something so beautiful and unique about her, that I want a part of that." Because really, there is nothing more pure, more lovely, more encouraging then for others to see the love and beauty of God not only in the way I speak, and handle myself, but just in my presence. I know in my home, when my focus and dedication is on "getting thin" I am often angry, displaced, and unhappy. I am not sharing the love of God nor his purpose for our lives with the people around me, my children and husband. I am not allowing HIM to be the one we focus on, instead I demand that they see ME and MY needs. When my focus is on being the light ~ there is so much difference in the way I see situations, and even expereince simple moments with our children and my husband. But most of all, I find that it is my utmost desire is to be found of great worth in God's sight ~ not the sight of others. That indeed is what matters most, am I right?