One of the most selfless relationships in our lives should be our marriage. I can't honestly say that I believed this from the beginning. Sure, I loved my husband but I thought we "owed" each other something. We "owed" one another our attention, devotion, and well.... I "deserved" more. It probably wasn't until the last few years that God really began working on me deeply. I LOVE my husband, and am ever grateful he has stuck with me for this long. I used to be really moody, and judgmental. Wow. How sad that we spent so much of our early marriage years like babies.... looking out for more of ourselves, then one another.
Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. 5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: 6 Who, being in very nature[a] God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; 7 rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature[b] of a servant, being made in human likeness. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross! Philippians 2:1-8 NIV
I am so thankful that God has been alive and working in my heart and my life every day. I am not perfect, nor am I close. But ... I am NOT where I once was! I am here, not there! (Sorry ~ the Dr. Suess influence never leaves!) I am more interested in learning more about my husband, and his interests. It's not so important to me to find MY time for MY interests. Let's take this past December. Do you know what I did the weekend before Christmas? It had nothing to do with Christmas prep, wrapping gifts, baking, holiday parties. It had everything to do with my husband. I went to the hunting lease with him! I LOVED it! He always goes to a cattle ranch here in Texas, and every other time I went I stayed home with the kids. This time? The kids went to grandma's and I went with the husband! Guess what!? I realized my husband is pretty amazing! I learned new things about him, and I can say that on the 5 1/2 hour ride up there and the 5 1/2 hour ride back down was fun! If he would have asked me to go three years ago i would have sadly laughed in his face. To think of how many amazing trips I have missed out on ~ is so heartbreaking to me yet it fuels me to push forward and to seek out those opportunities to get more!
Jesus did not seek out equality with God ~ that is a LOT in it's own to teach us! Women, wives, we must stop looking for equality in our marriages with our husbands! (Woah! I can hear a pin drop!) I know that I just cleared a room full of women who were raised with feministic values. I was born in the early 70's and I grew up hearing (from the world) women "rule". It always made me cringe, and still does. Why? I WANT my husband to be over me ~ his protection and leadership are always welcomed. Yes, I am a strong woman, but I am also a God fearing woman. I know that God has called me to be the help-meet to my husband not the other way around. I know that he created Joel THEN decided what mate would "complete" him but I never have and never will say that I am good on my own. I LOVE being the wife that I am ~ because I can humbly say that my husband is the leader in our home ~ in all areas!