The straw that what?!

This afternoon while the kids at school were napping I started to do part of a bible study that I was doing ~ well, it's not really an "official" bible study but ya know what I am getting at right?! Anyway, as I was jotting down some notes, I began to reflect over the last few months and really I realize just how overwhelmed I am inside, and on the outside. And trust me... it shows! Then suddenly I couldn't get an old saying out of my head.

"The Straw that broke the camel's back"

The idiom the straw that broke the camel's back is from an Arabic proverb about how a camel is loaded beyond its capacity to move or stand.This is a reference to any process by which cataclysmic failure (a broken back) is achieved by a seemingly inconsequential addition, a single straw. This also gives rise to the phrase "the last/final straw", used when something is deemed to be the last in a line of unacceptable occurrences. Variations include "the straw that broke the donkey's back", the "melon that broke the monkey's back", the "feather that broke the camel's back", and the "straw that broke the horse's back". (Complete information ~ which is pretty interesting can be found here.) 

This is pretty much how I feel today. Like ONE more thing is just going to be too much. Saying I feel overwhelmed ~ it really is an understatement and if I didn't know that bedtime was around the corner I would probably just get in my Explorer and just drive. Why? I am getting to the point I think....

One more week of school. One more week of really long days - day after day. One more week of trying to be the "great" mother I want to be, the wife I know my husband desires, and still get in every last bit of learnin' possible in my classroom all while keeping a house clean and dinner on the table every night (along with breakfast and lunches too) with clean clothes in the closets. Go ahead and throw in toting the teenager back and forth to drill practice, trying to remember to make sure the preteens have what they need for field trips, and last minute stuff at school for my own class and activities.  *Sheesh*

Photo Credit

What comes to mind is this - First I need to seriously go pray. I love and care for my family too much to take my frustrations and the simple fact that I am overwhelmed out on them. Second, I must remind myself of one important truth. I cannot rely on ONE SINGLE PERSON to make me happy ~ if I can't be happy with just me, myself, and I. It's not fair to them, and honestly they can't make me truly happy if I am not happy to begin with!

A straw is not very heavy.... but add one more thing to my day today.... and it will feel like a ton of bricks! Saying that "you are your own worst enemy" is true ~ but also saying "you are your own best friend" should be too. Right now.... I don't like myself! I don't want to be around myself either. The good thing? Tomorrow's a new day, and I am strong enough to pick myself up and try again.