Thursday, August 7, 2014
Thinkful Thursdays: Friends
It's that time again! Time to think Big! This Thursday though I am going to challenge you to think DEEP and you may not like what I have to share.
I have been guilty of telling preschoolers in my presence that "we are all friends" but really... should we be? I don't want to contradict myself but I am learning I don't WANT to be friends with everyone. Now , it didn't always used to be that way, and a HUGE part of me wanted me to be able to be everyone's friend. So much so that I could even see my own daughter's heart get crushed because she wasn't everyone's friend.
Guess what. We are NOT created to be friends with everyone. Sure, we are commanded to LOVE everyone and to be friendly but it doesn't mean we have to be FRIENDS.
Did you know... Jesus wasn't everyone's friend .He had enemies. Do you know why? Because there was a lot of judgement in living a life where you truly live for your purpose, passion and dreams to come to pass right before your eyes. WE need to be friendly to everyone we come in contact with but I NO LONGER believe that we should all be friends. Why?
* You become the company you keep. Don't think you can turn a heap of trash into a heap of sugar ~ that is now how the world works. Do you have to be mean? No. But do you have to be a part of it? NO! If you know what your values are and what you stand for, it isn't so easy to compromise on them.
* For YEARS I have felt like I needed anyone and everyone's friendship. I wasn't selective. I wasn't very choosey. HOW SAD!!! Sure, there are a good handful that I can think of that God just had a hand in the connection! Those I hold near and dear, and even though it's summer, I have talked to them often. But there are many who I once considered as friends have either dissolved or never were really more than an acquaintance. I know... that is just the cycle of life.
* Any friendship that causes conflict with your spouse. I know that sounds probably very 1950ish but really... who likes conflict in their marriage?! Not me! And I am not going to value one single earthly relationship over my husband. It just can't happen. Thankfully my husband and I are pretty much on board with that.
* Before I can be a good friend to anyone, I need to be a good friend with myself. Sounds conceited maybe but really... if I don't like who I am ~ why should you? Why should anyone? I would think that I probably put my husband through a lot of internal grief because of the times I was miserable with myself in my life and I didn't want to accept me for me. Now that I do, and I realize my value in this world ..... it's time to accept that value and put up some new boundaries that will not be crossed.
So, once again the kids in preschool taught me a lesson I didn't even realize they were teaching me. You do NOT have to be friends with everyone, but we all can learn to be friendly.